Don’t be a victim of your mistakes. Don’t be a victim of your own mind.

As we go through life as spirits living a human experience, we learn by trial and error.

If we liken ourselves as little children, we learn lessons like ‘the stove is hot don’t touch’. If as a child we decide to touch the hot stove the lesson is embedded more succinctly than taking someone’s word for it.

My Grandmother used to say “Some people have to take the logging road through life and some the freeway”.  I see that with some of my kids.

No matter who tries to teach you lessons about life, you won’t understand it until you have to go through it on your own.

That’s just how some people live their lives. It doesn’t mean they are bad people it’s just how they learn. The trouble is that living your life on the logging road sometimes leaves more physical and emotional scars.

If you have ever been affected by physical or emotional harm you would be considered a victim.

What if you are a victim caused by your own behaviour. How does that work?

Can we be a victim at our own hands?

Another downside of this life is the physical scars heal faster than the emotional scars caused by disappointing ourselves.

Yes, we can be a victim at our own hands when we live with the baggage of the mistakes we have made.

Especially when it effects –

  • other people
  • your reputation
  • your self esteem
  • your life’s plan

There are two ways to live. Running away and hiding from your errors or owning up to your errors and making recompense.

Example 1

Being A Victim

I have known people that let themselves down as well as others and live with the debilitating guilt.

You become a victim at your own hands.

Living with the weight of guilt is a ball and chain that holds you down from living your best life.

This is a first-degree assault on your soul.

What ever mistake was made is buried and long gone but you are still living it. Over and Over and Over ….

Forgiving yourself is as important as forgiving others. Guilt is toxic, reliving the mistake over and over. Love yourself, forgive yourself.

People who have a victim mentality have often suffered but haven’t developed a healthy way to cope. As a result, they develop a negative view of life, where they feel that they don’t deserve happiness.

“Don’t be a victim of negative self-talk. Remember you are listening.” 

– Bob Proctor

Example 2

Refusing To Be A Victim

I have also known people that have strayed off course and, thankfully, found their way back and made amends. There was humiliation but they owned it.

Even if the gossip and condemnation was worse than the crime, they owned it.

Strong people don’t play victim, don’t make themselves look pitiful, don’t point fingers. They stand and deal with it.

When you pay your dues, the misdeed is buried and gone.

Even God teaches if you are truly repentant think of it no more.

“Repent so that your sins may be wiped away.”

– Acts 3:19

To Err is Human to Forgive Divine.

You need to go through the steps to make things right then move on building a beautiful life for yourself. Having learned a lesson, one of many life lessons, you find your way to a productive life.

The victim mentality does not have to be a life-sentence, you can heal and overcome the impacts of your trauma caused by your misdeeds and the devastating effects it had on your life.

Example 3

Playing the Victim Card.

Sometimes playing the victim card can be a way not to take responsibility. That’s not what we are talking about here but its good to know the difference.

People who play the victim card use the victim mentality to relieve themselves of unwanted responsibilities. It’s just an excuse, just an act and a huge lack of character. Being a victim is very real for some people. These people are often bottom feeders, sucking the life out of those around them.

You play the victim; I’ll play the disinterested bystander.

No matter what happens in life, no matter what road you take refuse to be ruled by fear. Rule with honour, be a warrior, be courageous. You are stronger than you think.

Don’t hide from your mistakes. Deal with them and move on.

“Don’t Be A Victim Be A Victor.”

– Joel Osteen
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